Perseverance

God blesses those who persevere.

This was the concluding point of yesterday's sermon, and it has been on my mind over the past 24 hours. The text for the sermon was the story of Jacob and Laban (and of course, Leah and Rachel). You know the story--Jacob loves Rachel and arranges to work 7 years in exchange for her hand in marriage. Then, Laban turns the tables; tricks the trickster. Rather than Rachel, it's Leah who Jacob wakes up with the morning after the wedding. Laban utters some lame excuse for the switch, but it was clear that he was trying to pull a fast one. Jacob marries Rachel, too, but it costs him 7 more years of his life. He then proceeds to have a lot of kids with his wives and their maidservants.

The character in the story who displays perseverance is obvious, right?

Well, maybe and maybe not. Of course, Jacob endures for a total of 14 very long years of servitude for his uncle (half of those years, very likely resenting his uncle's dishonesty). That's tough. That displays real character, especially for someone like Jacob, who was not known for his integrity as a young man.

However, the real hero (or at least, so suggested Pastor Makoto) was.... (drumroll)

Leah!

Why Leah? Wasn't she in on her father's tricks? Probably she was, but what Leah ultimately wanted was Jacob's love--Something more unattainable for her than Rachel's love was for Jacob. Jacob could work 14 years and have finally earned Rachel, but Leah was chasing the wind. Tricking Jacob into marrying her didn't endear him to her any. We then read about each child that Leah bore to Jacob. Each time, she hopes "maybe now Jacob will love me!" But alas...

This continues until she gives birth to her 4th son, Judah. When Judah is born, Leah says "This time, I will praise the LORD." (Gen. 29:35). Finally, Leah pursues something greater than Jacob's love--the love of the LORD. Her perseverance is rewarded, as we know what Leah did not, that through Judah, the Savior of all mankind was born.

Pretty cool, eh?

When we think of blessing, we tend to think of an absence of sickness, an absence of despair or trials. However, what if blessing comes through opportunities to endure and persevere? What if following the LORD even through the bleakest times leads to the greatest joy?

It's been a long day (I ran well over a mile between the boys' and girls' races today, calling out times at opposite ends of the course), and my mind is reeling. I don't know if I can write any more coherently. But... I just wanted to throw that reflection on yesterday's sermon out there...

Persevere, all you who are tired and beleaguered. I know I will!

Hosanna

by Brooke Fraser

I see the king of glory
Coming down the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes
I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing, the people sing

Hosanna, hosanna
Hosanna in the highest

I see a generation
Rising up to take the place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a new revival
Staring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me
Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity



---

Every time I hear this song, I'm especially convicted by the line "break my heart for what breaks yours". It seems like so much of what upsets me, what frustrates me and what angers me is, in the scheme of things, very petty and selfish. It is a powerful prayer to ask to delight in what pleases the Lord and to grieve what He finds worthy of grief. Can I look past my own problems long enough to recognize the larger hurt in the world and in those around me? Can I align my heart to God? I need to remember to pray for this relationship, even when I'm tempted to focus on me, me, me.

Frustration

I literally cannot articulate what I am thinking and feeling today and that frustrates me to no end. Seriously--I've tried for maybe an hour or so to start this post and I'll get maybe a paragraph in before making judicious use of the delete key, because what I've written doesn't really fit how I'm feeling. The best I can describe it is a feeling of restlessness and frustration and above all not knowing what to do about it. Why can't I just be content, and just appreciate a peaceful day of rest?

What's wrong with me?

:P

A Reflection on the book of Ruth

I just finished rereading one of my favorite stories in the Bible: the book of Ruth. There's some nostalgia in this appreciation, as this was one of many Bible stories that my dad used to tell me before I could even read. However, beyond the "natsukashi factor", it's a simple, but powerful story of redemption, and one that so strongly points ahead to God's ultimate plans in Christ.

In the story of Ruth, there are several characters who go above and beyond the call of duty--namely, Ruth and Boaz. Ruth is not bound to go with Naomi after her husband (Naomi's son) dies, and in fact, Naomi expected her to stay behind. Yet, Ruth follows Naomi, saying, "Don't urge me to leave you or turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God." (Ruth 1:16)

Later, Boaz finds himself in a similar situation as he approaches the kinsman-redeemer, Naomi's closest living relative, about claiming the property of Naomi's deceased son. The kinsman-redeemer agrees, until he finds out that Ruth is part of the package. Not eager to bring about added complications to his family's inheritance (since the firstborn offspring with Ruth would carry her first husband's name to keep it alive), the relative declines the opportunity. So, Boaz goes above and beyond, taking Ruth as his wife without any care for the potential ramifications on family inheritance.

Who would I be in this story? I'd like to say that I'd be like Ruth and Boaz, that I would do more than what was expected of me to show love and faithfulness to others. However, I find that most of the time, I am more like Orpah (Naomi's other daughter-in-law) or the first kinsman-redeemer. These were not bad people--they simply kept their eyes on the ground in front of them and did not wish to worry about anything beyond that. Their actions serve as a foil for Ruth and Boaz' actions to make them seem all the more extraordinary: Here's what normal people would do, and here's what righteous people would do.

I pray that I can be endlessly faithful and loving, even when it is inconvenient to do so. I pray that I can broaden my perspective from what's right in front of me to what is happening around me, and that I can take action.

Amen.

Hypothesis confirmed

Yep, I am definitely an introvert. It was actually a very good day of conferences; both parents and students alike were encouraging across the board, which is good affirmation for me that what I do matters. In turn, I appreciated the opportunity to encourage students and their parents. So, in that sense, it was a very good day.

Still, it was 40 conferences (supposed to be 38, but a few extra families found their way in somehow). It's now 4:30 pm but my brain feels like it is a lot closer to bedtime. Today involved no physical activity beyond talking--in fact, I spent 90% of the day sitting. The cause for my exhaustion is clear: Lots of social interaction.

Well, only 26 more conferences to go--I know saying this makes me sound like a broken record but here goes: Time flies. I can't believe PT conferences are half done.

I might as well just start listening to Christmas music :P

Lunch-time

After spending my morning in the thick of all the social interaction that a classroom brings, I relish the peace and quiet of lunch break. I love the opportunity to simply sit alone and regroup... catch my breath. If a student sits down and wants to talk, I will not send them away, but I find that I can't recharge as well when that happens.

So, am I an introvert? Or an extrovert? I once told my students I was an introvert and they all thought I was joking. I didn't think I was joking, and I still don't. They said I wasn't shy enough, that I was not quiet enough to be an introvert. Here's the thing, though: being an introvert doesn't necessarily mean that a person is shy or quiet, just that a person loses more energy in heavily social situations than they gain (an extrovert thrives on the crowd).

That's me... I'm not a shy person* but I cannot deny that large crowds and lots of socializing with lots of people exhausts me. I do, however, get energy from teaching (which ostensibly happens in a lively social situation)... figure that out.

I'm not really going anywhere with this note... I'm just typing. And students are gathering around, so I shall wrap this up and make conversation!

*I AM shy in some situations. Girls my age, for example... yeah, never figured that one out :P

Sunset

(I took this photo in August the night before I flew back to Tokyo)

I returned to my classroom following an after school meeting today to find the room illuminated in a pale orange hue. Out the window, I could see the sun setting behind the tall buildings to the west. I stood and watched for a few minutes until the sun descended behind a sky-scraper and I remembered that I had places to be, things to do.

I often tell people that I don't miss much about the U.S. And that's true. However, there are a few things that I miss about the small corner of Washington State where I grew up. Aside from my family, I'd have to say my home church and the sunsets, in that order. I'll write about my home church some other time. Watching the sunset from my 3rd floor classroom was a peaceful moment in a busy day, but watching the sunset from a hillside in the middle of the country is... well, spectacular. It's telling to note that one of the most frequently painted scenes is a panoramic sunset... artists try their utmost to replicate the sight, but God actually created the sun and made it set. How awe-inspiring is that?

Take some time in the next week to watch the sunset (wherever you are--in Tokyo or on the farm) and just think about that truth... let it sink in.